Same Kind of Different As Me

I remember reading the book, Same Kind of Different As Me and thinking "My gosh.  Miss Debbie is a saint.  How in the world could I ever make a difference like that?"  While incredibly inspiring, I remember feeling overwhelmed and discouraged because I didn't think there was anything I could do to compare to what she did with Denver.  I read that book probably five years ago, if not longer...and it has stuck with me since.  

John Wesley said: 

    "Do all the good you can, 
    by all the means you can,

    in all the ways you can,

    in all the places you can,

    to all the people you can,

    as long as ever you can."    

It wasn't until this past year that I realized....the difference I make doesn't have to be on a "Miss Debbie scale."  It can be on a "Kim Mayes scale"...John Wesley style...."all the good you I can....by all the means you I can....in all the places you I can....to all the people you I can."  He didn't say "all the good.....by all the means....in all the places.....to all the people."  Those two words "you can" are important.  I can do what I can do....not what Miss Debbie can.  What I can.     

When we went to Colorado in December, we helped my brother and sister-in-law package "Blessing Bags" for the homeless in Arvada.  We went to Costco and stocked up on several different snacks, water, hand warmers, and ziplock bags.  Then, assembly line style, we filled the bags so Pj, Amy and Auggy could keep them on hand, in their cars.  And most recently, my good friend, JB, set out to do the same thing, instead filling his bags with miscellaneous hygiene supplies.  Simple.  There was no right or wrong. There was no way to mess up.    

In the book, Denver Moore said "Nobody can help everybody.  But everybody can help somebody."  So, today, my family set out to help somebody!  We went to the Dollar Store and stocked up on snacks, water and ziplock bags.  I copied my friend JB's sweet words and printed out a quick tag to go inside.  For less than $50 and in under an hour, we're ready to help 12 somebodies...."as long as ever we can."  

Super Heroes and Drums??

"The great challenge which faces us is to assure that, in our society of big-ness the grand orchestration of society leaves ample room for the man who marches to the beat of a different drummer."                                                                                                                    Hubert Humphries 

When I was a senior in high school, I was one of 12 or so students asked to write a speech for our baccalaureate ceremony.  As best I can remember, we were all given a letter, which related to a topic. I was given the "I" for Individuality.  As we were coached along in our speech writing, by Ms. Hazel Haley, we were "encouraged" to start our speeches with a meaningful quote.  I chose the quote above.  (Leave it to Chris to point out the foreshadowing to include a drummer....but we'll leave that for another post.)

But, I believe God knew then, that not only would I go on to marry a drummer....I would go on to raise a son who would "march to the beat of a different drummer."  This year, Harper's birthday party was no exception...and I couldn't be prouder.  

Most of you reading this already know that Harper has a great affinity towards art.  He really enjoys creating things and he seems to be pretty good at it.  Last year, he started taking art classes at an incredibly perfect art studio, Art Centric.  However, when October rolled around and we started planning his birthday party, the art studio became less than incredibly perfect.  He was afraid his friends wouldn't come, since most of his friends are into sports...not art.  He was afraid his friends would be bored.  And he wanted them to at least show up.  

But this year, when October rolled around, we asked him about Art Centric again.  And again he said he didn't think his friends would want to come to an art party.  Being a year older and wiser, we thought he was ready for a conversation about this.  We told Harper.... "Friends don't come to a party because it's something they want to do.  Your birthday party is for you.  You should do things that you want to do.  If they are truly your friends, they'll come because they want to celebrate you."  We also told him that it could be that his friends never really experienced art like he has.  This could be a great opportunity for him to share something he loves.

We said just what we "should have" said.  But the truth was, we were nervous.  What if Harp was right?  What if his friends, most of whom played baseball, didn't come to the party?  And if they did come, what if they didn't have fun?  

As his birthday party drew near, Ms. Becky at Art Centric was just amazing!  She worked with Harper to orchestrate the perfect painting party.....Super Heroes!  How fitting....in more ways than one.  While she had never hosted a Super Hero painting party, they worked together to come up with 3 "super" cool designs the boys could choose from.  And would you believe every single boy we invited, came...and, seemed to have a really good time.  And Harper walked away with an even greater sense of confidence.

Fast forward a couple of weeks after the birthday party.....as I scrolled through Instagram, I saw a post from Art Centric, showcasing their their latest Parent Night Out....Super Heroes!  Not only did Harp have the perfect birthday party for him....but he helped Art Centric create a new theme for Parent Night Out! How quickly the insecure boy became the "super hero"....and all because he chose to march to the beat of a different drummer!  

Soul Sistas

Several years ago, I was involved in a women's Bible study with some incredible women of faith.  While that Bible study group ran it's course and most of us moved in different directions, three of us remained close and now call ourselves the Soul Sistas.  Sheri, Betsy and I are each ten years apart; I'm the youngest.  We meet (somewhat) regularly for dinner and fellowship, but have never had an experience like the one we did a couple of months ago.

We keep a list of restaurants and normally pick somewhere to go off of the list (this way we don't have to rethink all the different choices, every single time).  However, this particular evening, one of us suggested a new place in town, Ovation Bistro & Bar.  None of us had been yet, so we decided to give it a go.  (See earlier blog post about opening your box and adjusting your plans.)

We met for dinner and were greeted by a super cheerful waitress, who introduced herself as "Sam, like Sam I Am."  Over the course of our 5-hour dinner, we caught up and shared important things happening in each other's lives.  Having ten years between us, always gives us good perspective for (most of) what we're facing.  We laughed as we shared family successes and we grew teary as we talked about family and personal struggles.

As "Sam I Am" kept checking in on us, we talked more and more with her and sat, literally, in awe as the evening unfolded.  We learned that Sam, who just turned 21, had been an orphan for quite some time.  Both her parents had passed and she had been homeless for several years.  Often she took care of the elderly, just to have a place to stay.  She shared with us that she was hoping to go to college to become a teacher.  (It's no coincidence that Sheri and I are both teachers, sitting at Sam's table.)  Her struggle, now, is that because she was never in the foster care system, she doesn't have a "number" to apply for financial aid, so college tuition is up to her right now.  She just purchased a car and, on top of her living expenses, has very little left for college.  

Then, she shared some of her personal struggles growing up, some of which mirrored exactly what I had just shared with my "sistas."  She spoke directly to me with the wisdom of an adult and said exactly what I needed to hear in that moment.  So much so, I ended up in tears.  And, those who know me well, know I don't just "tear up".....I ugly cry.  Every. single. time.  (Again, no coincidence.)

Fast forward a couple of weeks.  A sweet teacher friend of mine at school reached out asking if my church accepted donated women's clothes.  I told her about my experience at Ovation and asked if she would mind if I gave them to Sam I Am, instead.  (I took a guess that this teacher probably wore the same size-ish as Sam I Am.)  I reached out to Sam who was beside herself, literally speechless and in tears, as she drove over to pick up the bags of clothes.  It's no surprise that they fit her to a "T".

One of the most powerful Bible studies we did with our women's group was on the book of Esther.  Esther 4:14 has since become one of my favorite Bible verses, "And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?"  I have no doubt that Sam-I-Am was put into my life that very night, "for such a time as this"....just as, I hope, we were put into hers, too.  Next time you stop in to Ovation...be sure and ask for Sam-I-Am.  Tell her I sent you!