Little stuff?

Last week, Warren came home from school and told me he had received an infraction.  When I questioned him about what happened, he told me that a friend of his "tempted" him.  He and his friend walked down the hall to the bathroom.  On the way back, his friend "tempted him" to hide behind a column, rather than walk straight down the sidewalk back to class.  "Mom, I knew it was wrong.  But, he tempted me."

I once heard someone say "Listen earnestly to anything your children want to tell you, no matter what.  If you don't listen eagerly to the little stuff when they are little, they won't tell you the big stuff when they are big, because to them all of it has always been big stuff."

So, I listened.  I listened to the little stuff.  I listened to him tell me how he felt conflicted because part of him knew it was wrong to hide.  But, part of him wanted to stick with his friend.  I listened to him and I held him as he cried, telling me he knew he should've just walked back to class.  We talked about how strong you have to be to do what you know is right, even when your friends try to get you to do what is wrong.  

Little stuff?  Yes.  But wow!  Will that ever pave the way for the big stuff I'm sure we'll encounter in the not so far off future.  

I tucked Warren in and as we said his prayers that night, we asked God to help him be strong and make the right decisions, even when it's not easy.  And when I climbed into my own bed and said my own prayers, I prayed for Warren, too.  That God would help him to be strong.  But, more importantly, I thanked God that (so far) my boys feel comfortable talking to me about the "little stuff."  I thanked Him for putting the "little stuff" in my life to help prepare me for the "big stuff."  

The Plan

Life throws us all kinds of curveballs. But, if there's one thing I've learned in this game, it's that God has a plan. Always. He never takes a time-out; he never calls the game early. He has a plan. 

Chris recently had surgery, which required us to be at the hospital a bit longer than we had planned. So, my mom kept the boys for the night, so I could stay with Chris. If you read my last post, you learned that the personalities of my two boys are as different as their appearances. While Harper has not showed a bit of emotion towards Chris' surgery, Warren has had a very difficult time with it. He was in tears the night before and was very nervous the day of. Warren made sure he prayed for Chris the night before; Harper didn't even say his prayers.

So, as my mom tucked the boys into their bed, my heart was warmed to hear of their conversation:

Mom: "Boys, let's say our prayers."
Harper: "Wawwen can."
Warren: "I will." 

-prayer-

Harper gives mom a night kiss and turns over to go to sleep. Meanwhile, Warren begins to sniffle. 
Mom: "Warren, buddy, what's wrong?"
Warren: "I don't want Daddy to be hurt."
Harper: rolls back over "Wawwen, you know God has a plan." 


While I would love to take credit for this, I have to give the credit to the boys' amazing Pre-K teacher, Ms. Debbie Warren. We could not have asked for a better teacher for them, and consider ourselves beyond blessed to have had her teach both the boys. Of course I told her the story, as did my mom the next day. With tears in her eyes, she told me that their class theme is "God has a plan." And that every day they sing their class song, "God has a plan." 


The funny part about this story is that Harper was not supposed to be in Ms. Debbie's class. I put up a fuss and begged and pleaded that he have her. You see, God has a plan. Ms. Debbie was just the teacher that Harper needed during this season. She has helped instill in him that God does have a plan. We don't need to worry about Chris' surgery....He's already got it taken care of....and everyone scores!

Night and Day

Now that we are back in the swing of things and school has started up, I've had a chance to reflect on my summer and I've realized some things.  I'm not going to lie....the summer started off kinda rough.  This was the first summer I've had both boys at home....all....summer....long!

Warren wanted to be outside, playing ball every day....while Harper wanted nothing to do with that.  I started off the summer complaining that I couldn't find anything to do with both of them.    As the summer came and went, I've changed my pathetic tune.

Chris and I are blessed with two amazing little boys.  Both are very bright, but that's where their similarities end.  If you've ever seen my two boys, you can see how different they are.  Their personalities are as different as their appearances.

Although many say Harper looks just like me, Warren is my mini-me.  This boy likes to have a plan.  He is very structured....such a rule follower.  But, where Warren and I differ is in athletics.  In fact, that's where he is very much like my brother.  Warren is such an athlete.  He excels at any sport he tries.  He loves baseball and is very good at it.  But, most mornings, before school, you can find him in the driveway, playing "basketball."  (We don't have a basketball hoop, so he throws the ball on the roof....if he reaches, he counts it as a score.)  He loves to run.  He loves to ride his bike.  He loves to swim.  He loves being active.  And again, I am thankful.....I just have to learn to keep up!  Warren is our health nut.  He is long and lean.  Although he has become an extremely picky eater, he is always considering how things will affect his health.....thus part of the reason he enjoys being active.  He is also very sensitive and does not like to be by himself.  He loves to cuddle.  You can bet money that half way through a movie, he will come and sit on my lap.  And every night, when I tuck him in, he asks me to lay with him until he falls asleep.  And yes, there are many nights I roll my eyes and sigh, thinking of everything I have to get done before my bedtime.  But, I'm learning to savor those moments and I pray they don't end soon!    

And then there's Harper.  Harper has a way with people.  He's never (or, rarely) met a stranger.  And most people who spend time with him, very quickly fall in love.  For as structured as Warren is, Harper is equally as laid back.  He is such a happy, funny kid.  He just goes with the flow.  He tends to do things on "Harper time".  He would spend hours building with Legos or working on puzzles, if he could.  He loves art...loves to draw, paint and create.  He is perfectly content playing by himself.  In fact, often times I'll ask if I can do a puzzle with him, or draw with him, and he doesn't hesitate to tell me no.  Warren loves having his picture taken; Harper hates it.  So, while it may appear we only have one son...rest assured, the other is hiding, not far, behind the lens.  Where Warren is long and lean, Harper is round, solid and ummm...."not lean."  He looks like the kind of kid you could just cuddle with all day long.  But, sadly, he hates to cuddle (and I should admit that he comes by that honestly).  And though it doesn't show, he is also a very picky eater...he loves his carbs and would eat mac-and-cheese every day, if given a choice.

While Warren is very musical and has a very good sense of rhythm, Harper has a very good sense of lyrics.  He is in tune with the words of the songs.  Harper has the best sense of humor...very mature for a 4-year old.  He is the funniest kid I've ever met and just keeps us in stitches.

This summer was most definitely a big adjustment having both boys home....and while I had lots of complaining, initially (well, maybe not just initially)....I've learned that I am blessed!  I'm blessed not only with my two boys, but I'm blessed and grateful that they are as different as they appear.  They are not competitive with one another.  They both have incredibly different gifts to offer and celebrate.  They both excel at different things, and for that I am thankful.

Interestingly enough....my own brother and I are as different as night and day, but I'm not sure that you would meet a brother and sister who have a closer relationship than Pj and I.  We get along incredibly well.  We both have very different beliefs, but through that, we have learned respect.  I pray the same thing for my boys.  That as they grow, they will learn to respect those who have different beliefs and interests.  I pray that they will remain as close as they are now, even through their differences.  Hebrews 13:1 says "Let brotherly love continue."  I pray that it will!              

Sweet Dreams

Sometimes the best conversations come at the most unexpected times.  Instead of calming, relaxing and soothing, bath and bed time...at our house, it is often utter chaos.  It's during this time that the boys get most wound up.  So, trying to calm them down and get them ready for bed is often a challenge.  Divide and conquer.  That was tonight's strategy.

I am generally a stickler about bedtime routines...heck, any routine for that matter.  But, as a teacher, reading at bedtime is a non-negotiable....until tonight.  Warren and I went into one room and read My Father's Dragon together, while Chris and Harper went into another room and read....or so I thought.  

Turns out Chris and Harper were having a deep conversation about dreams.  I would be lying if I didn't say that I got the slight bit jealous.  I want to have those conversations with my boys.  So, I didn't beat around the bush...I came right out and asked Chris what Harper's dreams were.  And I can honestly say I was not expecting the answer I got.  

"Naked birds.  And they are naked because they hit a fan and their feathers blow off, then they run around naked."  

Sweet dreams, dear child!

Blessed Beyond Belief

One of our dear friends has a quote that we have adopted, "Blessed Beyond Belief."  Recently, we had a day off of school and it turned out to be one of those days where I was able to stop and really see how truly "blessed beyond belief" I am.  Between work, baseball, church, band, and other commitments, days off like that are few and far between.  The boys and I started the day decorating a friends' classroom for her 50th birthday!  I'm blessed to have such good friends!

We left my school and headed to lunch with my mom.  I'm blessed to have such a great family! 

And after lunch, we headed home for what we thought would be another day of housework.  Instead, we decided to kick back and enjoy the day.  Our recipe for a perfect day looked something like this:

• beautiful, picture perfect weather
• baseball bats and all kinds of balls strewn across the backyard
• Warren and 3 "big kids" out back, going back and forth between the trampoline and a baseball game
• Harper and 2 "little kids" next door, having a dance party
• glasses of water sitting everywhere
• one pan of brownies and one full batch of cookies....gone!

And what did I do?  I left the laundry in the basket, dishes in the sink, ungraded papers in the bag, and sat on the back porch and soaked it all in.  I'm blessed to live in a great neighborhood, with fantastic neighbors who all have boys for my kids to play with. 

Fast forward several days....when it was a bit more difficult to realize how blessed we are.  Chris and the boys were bouncing on the trampoline, when apparently something went wrong.  Warren got very, very upset and came storming inside, crying and screaming, "I'm going to move!"  I followed him to his bedroom and tried to calm him down, asking where he would move to.  Through the screaming and tears he replied "I don't know, but maybe I'll become poor and stand on a sidewalk with a sign.  Then maybe when Daddy and Harper come by, maybe they'll want me to come back home."

Update...Warren did not move and is not standing on a sidewalk holding a sign. We are blessed beyond belief!

Happy Valentine's Day!

It has been a crazy busy season in our house.  But, between school starting, baseball season coming and going, piano practicing, Chris changing positions and a billion other things...I have managed to try to jot down some of those precious "mommy moments" that I know are going to be passing by all too quickly.

Those of you who know Harper may appreciate this first story more than others.  But for those who don't know him.....here's what you need to know:  Harper is our tough guy, scared is not a part of his vocabulary.  While he may look incredibly cuddly, he is anything but.  He doesn't like to be held, doesn't like to be kissed or hugged.  (I'm sure this is my payback; I don't know where he gets it from?)   

Back up to a couple of nights ago.....Just when I thought all was right with the world...Chris ran to Publix and the boys were in bed, asleep.  Or so I thought.  Shortly after Chris headed out, I rejoiced with the few minutes of solitude I (thought) I had.  Out walked Harper.  As I sat typing on the computer, he walked up with a big frown on his face as only Harper can do.  Quickly realizing this was a one time thing with Harper, I didn't even think twice before I stopped typing and spun around to him crawling up in my lap.  He looked at me, frown on his face and said "Mommy, I'm scared."  I replied, "Aww, buddy, what are you scared of?"  Mr. Independent caught me off guard when he said "Mommy, I'm scared of getting bigger.  I don't want to be 5."  Well, melt my heart!  I tried to console him by saying, "But Harper, when you're 5 you get to go to Kindergarten."  Not missing a beat, he outsmarted me...."But Mommy, then I will have to do homework."  I tried changing the subject, but he came right back to being scared..."Mommy, I'm don't want to lose my teeth either."  

Several days later, Harper and I were on our way to school one morning.  It was Spirit Week at his school and this particular day was Wacky Day.  It also happened to be Friday...Pizza Day.  Harper and I were talking about the word "wacky."  (The educator in me is always trying to squeeze in a good vocabulary lesson.)  To illustrate, I said "Harper, do you know what would be really wacky?  What if today, Pizza Day, you had pizza with M-n-M's on it?  That would definitely be wacky!"  I looked in the rear view mirror to see his eyes widen and his little eyebrows raise.  "Actuwee Mommy, I fink I may wike that."  So, maybe that was my non-example of "wacky"?

Then, tonight, as we sat around our table, preparing for Valentine's Day, the boys were making their teachers' cards when Warren asked, "Mom, what does Valentine's Day honor?"  Hmmm....good question, I thought.  "Well buddy, I guess it honors love.  It honors the people we love and the people who love us."

Harper chimed in "Momma, how did you and daddy marry?"  Hmmm...another good question.  This was a little more than I bargained for.  I was looking forward to pink and purple hearts, and maybe a few giggles thrown in about girlfriends.



 "When Daddy and I knew we loved each other so much we wanted to get married, we went down to church and met with Pastor Riley one day.  The three of us prayed and asked God to bless us by marrying us."  After he thought about it for a minute, he replied "Well, I'm gonna marry Ashwee."  I know it's probably still too early to tell, but I'm gonna pray he continues to have good judgement!